Sunday, May 1, 2011

Apple Bottom Jeans. Books to Return.

I was on campus on the 28th, to hand in a term paper and return a library book.  The attempt at handing in the paper was complicated by a number of things, most notably the whole department being closed, so I decided to take the book back to the library.  While walking, I began to notice that every ass in sight was glorious.  Impeccable.  Pristine.

This continued the entire way to the library.  Bam.  Ass.  Booty.  Butt.  Cheeks.  Mmmm.  Dayum.

I walked into the library, and the cavalcade of caboose continued all the way to the checkout/dropoff desk.  Girls coming down the stairs had dat ass.  Girls walking by had dat ass.  Hell, even the girl behind the counter had a respectable portion of posterior.

As I approached the counter, she smiled at me and said, "I can take that for you!"  All chipper and bouncy and friendly.  I checked the book for remnants of bookmarks I had used while perusing it for my paper, and handed it over with a grin.

The act of handing that book over and making as if to leave the library triggered some sort of quantum shift in the nature of the ambient derriere.  From the very first step away from that kiosk, suddenly, the badonk had no adonk.  Meh at best, the entire walk back home.

The lesson here, is that Libraries Reward You With Butts.  And when you leave?   They take it away.  Big sad.

Note to self:  Renew Library Card.

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